Here I go! I am venturing in to the world of the Proverbs 31 woman. This woman is meant to inspire us, inform us, but oftentimes all she does is discourage us.
I know how intimidating she can appear as we try to use her description in the Word as a guide for our own lives. She seems like one of “those” women who always appears perfect, even doing her chores in heels and pearls.
But this time as I read through her portion of Scripture, I was struck by a simplicity she seemed to operate by, one that seemed readily available and applicable to each of us no matter how unlike her we feel. Proverbs 31:27 captures the essence of her plan of attack for her mountainous to-do list (which by the way I think we can all relate to, trying to accomplish the never ending list). It says, “She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” Pretty simple but yet so profound.
I have been on both sides of the spectrum. I was a stay-at-home mom for 15 years and now I have been a working mother for 9 years. I have lived with the constraints of time in both worlds, when helping little ones do the simplest of things devours loads of time and when a job eats in to the most productive hours of the day to get items checked off the to-do list. It is equally challenging to accomplish all that needs completing each and every day. The tendency is for one day’s chores to roll over into the next day’s, thereby increasing the likelihood of feeling overwhelmed and underproductive. This can also cause tension in the home with our spouse, and the children themselves as they get older, as our home can become disorganized and chaotic.
That is why I feel the Proverbs 31 woman can help us formulate our own guide for productivity that will maximize our use of time. This is keeping in mind that we don’t need to “accomplish ” 24 hours a day. By making the most of our time when possible, it can allow time for rest and relaxation with the family we are trying to care for. Time to sit and enjoy our moments with them is just as important as taking care of our responsibilities. But reading through the book of Proverbs teaching nothing less than “first things first”.
Verse 27 is the key I think in the Proverbs 31:10-31 passage. Through the verses describing her life and habits, she is nothing but productive, accomplishing tasks and ministry in the home and in the community. She works both inside and outside the home, taking care of her family’s needs and also contributing toward the financial well-being of her household. But verse 27 captures her ability to make the most value of her time; she “does not eat the bread of idleness “.
To me this means she does not waste her time (back home this is referred to as “no fiddle-farting around). She is not enticed by things that would rob her of what she could be accomplishing. She is diligent against distractions.
I remember when I was a stay-at -home mom of 3 children, one way I tried to fight against distractions was to make a rule for myself: no television on during the day for me. The children may watch a Barney episode but I did not have it on for me until after dinner. That way I was not tempted to stop and watch something that appeared interesting on the screen, which would only serve to rob me of precious minutes I needed to get my work completed in my home. I figured a few moments robbed here and there added up to too much over a period of time.
I also would not read a newspaper, books, or magazines during the day, only when what needed to be done was completed. This is where our family developed a saying, “Do what you need to do before you do what you want to do”. This saying was taught to the children from the beginning as we tried to instill the importance of responsibilities to them. This was valuable as they began to have homework and chores for themselves that needed to be accomplished.
In my day, at least in the beginning years, there was not the issue of computer and social media to distract me. I would definitely have added those to my list of potential distractions to avoid until I could afford the time to indulge on them. If we added up the minutes, sometimes hours, each day that we waste on these devices, we would be appalled I think.
Whether it is television or texting or Pinterest, all are examples of “eating the bread of idleness ” that ultimately work against us in the end. There is profit from keeping practical priorities in our daily schedules. By diligence and self-discipline, we can incorporate the simplicity of the Proverbs 31 woman and enjoy some of her success for ourselves.
It says in verse 28 that her children arise and call her blessed and that her husband praises her. Because she has watched over the affairs of her household, her family is well-cared for and they reap a reward they are pleased to pass on to her in praise.
I love how at the end we get a glimpse of her inspiration and motivation for living the life she works so diligently for, “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.” Notice how she is not living this life for the pretense of her own reputation and glorification. She is not trying to display her “praise” on social media for all the other moms to see and envy. She is doing this because she feels this is the life her LORD calls her to, privately and personally, not to out-do anyone else.
This time I am not discouraged when I read about the Proverbs 31 woman. I am convinced it does not have to be so complicated to live a life of productivity and success as I strive to take care of the affairs of my household. Keep it simple. Guard against the distractions and I too will know “busy hands make light work”.
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